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To The Girl Who Can’t Love Less

Written by Christine Pembroke for YettiSays Self-Love Month | “To The Girl” post series.

[Tweet “”Love is no assignment for cowards.” – Ovid”]


Dear Christine,

There’s a lot I can say about the way you love. You love deeply, hard, and quickly. You love recklessly, intensely and without repentance.

I’ve often played over in my mind many of the unbelievable situations you’ve gotten yourself into, and for better or worse, it was that doggone heart of yours.

Remember that summer you were leaving a concert and saw a woman crying on some steps? She was all alone and looked hopeless. As your friend tried to mind his business and keep walking, you stopped to ask her if she was okay. When she continued sobbing, you threw your arms around her and told her it would be okay. I’m sure you’re laughing reading this because you know how insane it sounds. That girl could have had a knife or been a decoy for a cartel. Did you consider these things? Nope. Crazy, crazy girl.

There was also that time you saw a woman and her son standing on the train platform in the dead of winter without proper coats. They looked like they were from humble means, so you gave the woman your card and told her to call you if she needed things for her son. In less than 24 hours, you purchased that kid a coat, hat, scarf, thermals, and a hoodie and delivered it 20 miles across town that night, when you had work the next morning. Crazy, crazy girl.

At many points in your life, you tried to love less. You got tired of the frustration, hurt, and abandonment you’d feel when you’d pour into someone who didn’t know how or didn’t choose to reciprocate. You tried, but you simply couldn’t. You’d block, then unblock, you’d say you didn’t have the time, then make the time. We won’t get into the details of your father, but as much as he’d hurt you, I’m sure you’d still make the bandwidth for that guy.

Over time though, I must say, you’ve learned to couple your love with wisdom and discernment. I’m proud of you for that. As a result, you’ve been able to protect your heart and learn when to love from a distance. You’ve learned to love without robbing yourself of respect and peace. Whew, I’m so happy you’ve gotten there.

I can’t say I understand the requirements of gaining your love, but there’s something I’d like you to remember: in all the loving that you do, please be sure to love yourself just as insanely. I’m not talking about spa days and shopping sprees; I’m talking about the deep love that you extend to others. Being patient with yourself when you don’t learn something as quickly as you’d like, or forgiving yourself when you make a mistake. Give yourself the benefit of the doubt when you do something crazy and say, “maybe I’m just having an off day.” Give yourself the same grace you extend to others.

I know you’re still working out the kinks, but it’s okay that you can’t love less. The way you love is a superpower. The way you love has saved the hope and in some cases the LIVES of the people around you. In today’s world, it’s so easy to become calloused, selfish, bitter and untrusting.

The world is lucky to have a crazy lover like you. As the great poet Ovid once wrote: “Love is no assignment for cowards.”

All My Love (And I mean ALL),
Christine


Christine K. Pembroke, Writer, Vocalist, Strategy and Operations Consultant
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5 Comments

  1. Sooooo much yes, Christine! The world does need more lovers like you, and so do YOU. Love this letter and the Ovid quote at the end — had never heard it, but it’s so very true. 💛 Melanie

  2. “Over time though, I must say, you’ve learned to couple your love with wisdom and discernment.” and “The way you love is a superpower. The way you love has saved the hope and in some cases the LIVES of the people around you.”

    All of this!! Singing my heart’s song in this whole letter. And as a recipient of your big love I agree that the world is a much better place with “crazy lovers” like you!

  3. Awh My Dear…the family gift and curse all wrapped up in one – well said from your vantage point! Love the enlightenment of turning this love thang on you! Kudos for that…some of us take a long time to get there. Much love!

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