Meet my friend Tatenda (known for her infectious laugh and smile). I’m not quite sure if she even remembers this, but while we worked at a local studio station during high-school she gave me my first pep talk on self-worth when a few of my classmates publicly ganged up on me after a dance class. Though it was about 8 years ago, I still refer back to the conversation she and her friend, Acecia, gave me. I asked Tatenda to participate because I admire her strong will and dedication to her brand. Check her out!
Tatenda
Quick Tid-Bits
– Name: Tatenda Gumbo
– Age: 23
– Occupation: Journalist
– Your Passion: In search of…
– Random Fact: I talk a lot, and write a lot, hence the paragraphs I am about to give for these questions. I guess that might not be that random
Do you think you have great self-esteem? If yes, was there a time when you didn’t and why?
I think I have always had self-esteem. As a young woman you get to a point where you seek validation from your family, your peers, society, and it depends how you manage that. Personally I have always had a level of confidence and self esteem and when that level was questioned or tested ie: boys, style, sexuality etc I came out the other side of it learning and knowing myself a little better. I realized everyone was not going to appreciate me, everyone wasn’t always going to be so nice, and if I spent MY time trying to seek validation from them I would never make it.
What do you think is the most attractive thing about you and why?
Hmmm… Wow… I would say my smile. I think it draws people closer, its inviting well at least that’s what I hear.
Do you sometimes feel the need to conform to society standards (Physical and Non-Physical)?At times yes, or at least I have. I think society and cultural standards are very daunting. If they stem from your cultural and social setting, your ethnic background, familial traditions etc, it can be daunting in trying to make them part of your life, but also finding a healthy balance where you won’t find yourself lost. I find myself conforming at times to societies standards in terms of beauty, style, sexuality, morals and beliefs but I have realized at this point I am personally making a conscious decision to do what I have chosen to do, and in the end it is more of a choice rather than a social pressure.
In terms of women with low self-esteem, who’s to blame: Her or society?
Its a case of it all, society plays a major role, but also who you are and where you have come from and how you conceptualize situations. Self-esteem is hard thing to deal with and I think it is not a one tier issue. And I think people have to realize that.
If there were one thing you could share with the many women who suffer from a lack of self-worth and self-esteem, what would it be?
Become you, learn and earn your self worth and self-esteem give your self time to learn who you are and who you will become, make mistakes, and never regret. You are not the same as any other person, and for that you can never search for validation from anyone but yourself. As it goes, you can’t love anyone until you love your self. Love your self first.
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