Remember when I said I would try to speak good things into existence? Well a few weeks ago I was convinced it was not possible. This year, may have been one of the hardest years of my life. I remember saying this last year and thinking, “God, please don’t make it get worse.” And do you know what happened? Within a few short weeks of the year my health issues peaked and I found myself in the hospital thankful for the wonderful donors in this world.
But do you want to know something? Do you want to hear some truth? My life is not shit
I may hit a rough patch, I don’t know, biweekly as of late, but:
– I’m breathing
– I have Mummy & Daddy that drive me crazy yet let me know I am loved at all times
– I have Delli, that causes me stress over her ridiculous mishaps, but loves me unconditionally
– I have a job that may or may not be the reason why I have high-blood pressure, but continuously allows me to support myself
– And I still have a chance to keep going… to make something of this lifetime.
This weekend I realized that speaking things into existence did work. Everything negative I have thought out and envisioned happening, I have somehow attracted. Terrible situations with “friends” & friends, exes, family, work and random acts of life. They’ve all happened.
So how does one channel their thoughts into a more positive direction? I really don’t know. I mean I know how to do it. You practice. But to make it a continuous thing? Well, we’ll just have to find out huh?
I don’t think you guys understand how hard it is for me to keep a positive mindset. Some days it’s easy, some days I do not even realize that I am torturing myself with my self deprecating thoughts and constant focus on my need to be better, my focus on lack. A few weeks ago someone told me I am repetitive on the things I want to change, yesterday I was told that I need to give myself credit and focus on the good I have. I’m not quite sure why it’s so difficult to do so certain days, but I can’t lie… my effort dwindles after a week of positive thinking or forced positive thinking I should say.
Make sure your worst enemy is not living between your own two ears
So today I’m making an effort to stop the repetition and do the hard work needed to have a more positive outlook in life. Detoxifying my mind, as some would say. Everything else I’m sure will follow suite.
Here are a few videos and a link I was sent yesterday to help me begin:
Check them out!