It’s not just you out there. I mean sometimes it feels that way because our minds are active little fuckers that take the W in prank wars and creative thinking, but trust me on this one, you’re not alone. Actually you’re the opposite because you belong to an army of incredible warriors bonded by the harshest battle anyone can endure: the battle against oneself. You bare scar tissue from the harsh realities our minds put together. You are tribal marked by life, and unintentional but sometimes secretly intentional self-inflicted pain. You nurse wounds caused by neglect, physical or mental abuse, and chemical imbalances that can’t always be explained. You are solid bravery and with that you are not alone.
You’re not broken either despite what your mind is telling you today. Despite how your body is acting today. Despite how life is responding to you today. It’s a simple as this: You, my friend, are whole, and much more pieced together than you want to believe. Sure, you come with a few tarnished areas and possibly even dents, but those distinct qualities make you the work of art you must learn to cherish. You’re as whole as they come. Just as whole as when you were born, and the more you acknowledge it, the more it’ll start feel that way.
So be kind to yourself. Speak to yourself softly. Give way for self-compassion. Be nice to you. Being a survivor is no joke, and though you’ve been to battle, and will mostly battle again, you ought to be handled with care. Because healing needs care. And your healing takes time. So invest in some self-care, not the bullshit force-fed to you by Buzzfeed, but the real caring of yourself, and learn to speak beautiful to you.
Hell, let it be beautiful because you’ve fought hard for every smile and chuckle that gets to escape your lips. Appreciate those happy days, and savor the good moods. Make mental reminders of how good it feels to be calm and collected, and thank the universe for manifesting this pleasure into your life. Your story is not ideal, no, but the magic you can create from your experiences? That is pure 24 karat gold.
But please, pretty please, remember it’s not just you out there, because each time we acknowledge another’s battle, the closer we are to saving another’s life.
Good luck survivor.
a Survivor too.
Post written from Minority Mental Health Month
and in memory of Karyn Washington.
Miss you and love you, Kay.